Advice Column…#AskingAlex by Alex L., Corning-Painted Post High School

Zayn asks: Alex, I am currently a junior in high school and I am having to start my college search and I am very stressed out. I feel as though it’s too early for me to have to make this decision and I’m not ready to leave my group of friends. What should I do?

Alex says: Zayn, your problem is a common one and you are completely normal for having these feelings. At this stage high school you are responsible for a lot and many changes will be coming in the next few years. However, you still need to work hard and enjoy your last few years in high school with all of your friends. But, the guidance counselors and teachers in your school are all there to help and support you and can assist in your decision making process and have tons of information. There are also numerous websites with helpful information such as Don’t worry too much about it, everything will work itself out!

Kaylie asks: Hey Alex, lately I have been feeling extremely lost and lonely because my boyfriend has recently broken up with me and my friends don’t include me anymore. What can I do to start feeling like my normal self again?

Alex says: Kaylie, I am very sorry for your recent sadness. It seems to me that you have a lot going on in your life right now and I’m sure that these hard times will not last extremely long. Regarding your boyfriend, were you happy in this relationship? If you weren’t, then maybe this was for the best and you will find someone even better, or if you were happy in a healthy relationship then you should talk to him and figure out what the problem was and talk about it. However, you should never change yourself for anyone. Then regarding your friends, if they constantly don’t include you and are rude they may not be true friends. It is possible that they were feeling excluded from you while you were in a relationship so the best thing to do would be to talk to them. You should ask them why they haven’t been including you and maybe try to make more room in your schedule for friends. One thing I would definitely not recommend doing would be to post your problems on social media. It may seem as a good form to talk about your emotions but it will only create more problems. You can always discuss your problems with your parents or teachers and they could help you even more. I know you will be happy again soon!

SiSi asks: Alex, I have a problem that I hope you can help with. My parents have never understood technology and they do not trust me with my phone or my computer. I don’t want them to take my devices away but I don’t know how to make them understand. Can you please help me?

Alex says: SiSi, all parents are different, however this is a problem many teens these days experience. Your parents are just concerned for your safety and these technologies are ever changing and they did not have the same access when they were your age. With modern social media it is easy for a teen to get harmed or use it irresponsibly, so maybe if you take the time to show them how they work and create an account they can use, they will trust you more. There are also a few different changes they can make to parental controls to allow them to trust these medias more. I know that may not sound like something you necessarily want but at least it gives them the option to feel more secure. I think as long as you take the time to explain the benefits of a cellphone and computer and discuss what you do to prevent bad things from happening online, they should understand and trust you. Good luck!

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